I just want to go with him on an interview.
"So Mogulmike, tell us why you think you'd be a good fit for the company."
"Not a drunk pussy from pssville coming in late. I can work longer cuz muh muscles don't dehtdratevfron the alcyoohawl. Drunk bums be quitting while Mogilmike keeps workin."
I don't rip, I bomb.