I have been converted

Now that I buy into the need for orange safety netting along the sides of every slope, I have come up with a few more ideas.

1. Orange safety netting should be added to any lift that goes over a trail. The entire lift footprint should be surrounded by the orange safety netting. This border will eliminate the risk of a ski or snowboard or patron or chair falling on a fellow slider. There will be periodic openings manned by ski patrol to allow people to safely cross under the lift. Adding this safety netting means that you will no longer need to pad the lift towers or blow snow under any lifts. This huge monetary savings will easily finance the netting.

2. Every ski area must have a ski off area in order to classify skiers. A group of PSIA instructors will judge each and every slider. The skiers/boarders then must purchase a vest that matched their rank (green for beginners, blue for intermediates, red for advanced). Each vest will have a chip that matches your lift ticket to prevent vest swapping. You would only need to do this one time unless you wanted to increase your rank. You can decrease your rank at any time. These vests will allow you to ski only in the designated areas that match your vest. Just as beginners will not be allowed on advanced trails, advance skiers will not be allowed on green trails. This will be much safer for all skiers and boarders.

3. All ski patrol members must be deputized in order to enforce the vest rules. They will have the power to write tickets and arrest those who do not follow the rules.

4. All ski areas must have a judge and courtroom available during all skiing hours in order to process the violators. Jail facilities also must be added and maintained. All the cells must have a view of the slopes in order to further punish the violators.

These simple, affordable rules will be easy to enforce and make ski areas much safer for all of us. Just think of all the lives that would be saved.

x10003q wrote

 All the cells must have a view of the slopes in order to further punish the violators.

  I especially like this part^^

"All the cells must have a view of the slopes in order to further punish the violators."

No, they should be put to work as lifties, especially on powder days.

No go dude, I do my biggest flatland tricks under the lift, and live and die for the commentary.

speed guns....speed guns are necessary to ensure that no one is skiing beyond a safe and moderate speed.....

That's all good with me.  Just as long as they groom all that fresh snow - on every category run.  Pack it down..,pulverize it into corduroy.  Is this too much to ask?

TD

Telemark Dave wrote

That's all good with me.  Just as long as they groom all that fresh snow - on every category run.  Pack it down..,pulverize it into corduroy.  Is this too much to ask?

TD

Screw that! Powder makes your fall softer anyway.
==============================
p.s.
Make sure you break your ski pole in half so you can use it as a shank. What happens in ski jail stays in ski jail.

Then I won't need my helmet.  That's no good. It's saved me many times.  Trees, fences, Pisten Bullies.  I've hit them all.  Not a single significant concussion that I can recall...



Thank goodness for socialized healthcare here in Hinterland.  Hasn't cost me anything either.

TD

Grillman wrote

speed guns....speed guns are necessary to ensure that no one is skiing beyond a safe and moderate speed.....

Good Idea, but I am going to up the ante a little. I think you could accurately track speed in real time with the chip vest / gps system. Any infractions could lead to immediate remote revocation of the lift ticket, and based on telemetry information, the deputized ski patrollers would be waiting for you at the bottom to escort you to ski jail. There's an app for that.

I say the chip gives them an electric shock. Wait what is the crime again

Yahooing and Gaping are pretty much felonies.

We really, Really , REALLY need Snow to get all the weird ideaers out of the air. Good 18 to 24 inches of sturdy snow will do a lot to get these threads back on track.

Before this gets totally out of control I'd suggest to Harv that he should dump this into the other crap show thread.  I saw this sprout into a couple other discussions as well

As Arron Rodgers said everyone RELAX

Skiing is only a month away

Go do you pre season workouts and prep your gear and oh be nice to your fellow Harv Roaders

You know Coach, this is a pretty harmless thread.  Just having some fun.  Go visit TGR, heck, go visit TGR's padded room if you need perspective.

 TD

Whoa. No, baby steps, first. That's a little extreme.

Coach Z wrote

be nice to your fellow Harv Roaders

The kindler gentler Z. Who'd a thunk it.