Lame Joke

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Lame Joke

DrSkimeister
A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know...., I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2013 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.

"Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas trips. This is
rather awkward to say but you will also have as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker said, "Yeah, well ... You started it."

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Re: Lame Joke

campgottagopee
LOLLOLOLOL

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Re: Lame Joke

Hudsonhiker
Thanks I needed a lame joke for my brother at work tomorrow. I liked it thou.

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Re: Lame Joke

warp daddy
.  Yo doc THAT one WILL be used in good time my man , in good time !

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Re: Lame Joke

DrSkimeister
In reply to this post by DrSkimeister
A guy walks into a bar in rural New York state and orders a Long Island Iced Tea.

The bartender looks at the guy and says, "Y'all aint from round here, are yah?"

"No", replies our hero, "I'm from New Jersey."

"Well, Whut cha do in New Jersey?"

"I'm a taxidermist."

"Whut in the world is a tax-ee-dur-missed?"

"I mount animals."

The bartender extends his hand and hollers at the whole bar, "It's all right, boys, he's one of us."

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Re: Lame Joke

campgottagopee
 now that's funny!!!

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Re: Lame Joke

DrSkimeister
At a wedding party recently someone yelled, "All the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living."















The bartender was crushed to death.

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Re: Lame Joke

tBatt
I need to forward these to my dad.

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Re: Lame Joke

DrSkimeister
In reply to this post by DrSkimeister
It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same
neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house...fine cigars.
The third house handed him fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by
the hand and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the best sex he had ever experienced.
Then she made him breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.
"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something
special for you. I asked him what to give you."
He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar."
The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

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Re: Lame Joke

campgottagopee
I really need to drink a few beers with you

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