What to do when child rejects skiing?

ScottyJack wrote

 

umm, so the problem is???  

Not a problem, really.  Two things: first, she was on the cusp of advancing to being comfortable on black diamonds; she lost interest and the other two advanced.  Second, I wish she was out there with me.  But I know you gotta let go sometime.

Petronio

understood.  but man she could be doing a lot worse things than reading, studying and hanging w/ mom!  sounds like you did a great job being a father bro.  

Petronio wrote

Coach Z wrote

Do you really want to leave your rebelling teen alone while you are skiing?  Even straight a students with too much time on thier hands can find trouble.

We make her come with us to North Creek.  She reads and studies.  My wife does not ski so they are together.

Petronio

That puts quite a bit different spin on it especially considering your wife is not a skier.  Sucks for you since I know how much fun it is to ski with your kids but like someone else said you don't really have a issue here.

My advice to my son who is just starting the girl interest phase is no drama queens and no non skiers.

I would try to get some one on one time skiing with her. Maybe a semi private lesson to boost confidence and spend time together? Another skiing family with kids that age sounds good too. Offer to bring a friend? Could be a boyfriend  issue?

There was a good article on this on the last page of Ski Magazine this month, written from the perspective of the girl, who is now in college.

She said she never really had the passion her father had (she would plead with him for half days and quit at lunch, while the father would ski all day), but when she got to college and her friends wanted to go skiing, she fell back in love with the sport and she was forever grateful to her father for letting her choose how much to ski as a kid.

I can't find the article online, but it's this month's Ski Magazine, last page.

sno

I agree with ya that everything seems too serious for teens today between school and sports. Check out
http://changingthegameproject.com
Really this is for parents and coaches but it will show you are not alone in thinking this way.

You can't just become a recluse - you need to try put yourself out there to meet poeple.  They aren't going to seek you out.  This is a life skill you need to acquire and the sooner the better.  This was my biggest fear of only having one child in that in some ways you relate better to adults than kids your own age.

Go to Mt Creek and ask to become an instructor.  By nature we are a very outgoing group and if you surround yourself in that it's going to rub off.  Teaching also will force you to come out of your shell.  There also are bound to be a few cute girls also teaching.  I met my wife in the new instructor training group at MC back when it was VV and I was 22.  Yes I know MC well.  

Coach Z wrote

frk wrote

Coach, what are you saying? Lockdown? Timeout? Why not just drop her off at one of the many ny state gulags in the Adirondacks while skiing. Maybe a little time in solitary will change her mind.

Do you really want to leave your rebelling teen alone while you are skiing?  Even straight a students with too much time on thier hands can find trouble.

HELL NO! If I had the choice of leaving the teen home or pulling the plug on the trip/outing, I'd pull the plug. The movie Risky Business comes to mind.

Coach Z wrote

You can't just become a recluse - you need to try put yourself out there to meet poeple.

Petronio wrote

  Two things: first, she was on the cusp of advancing to being comfortable on black diamonds; she lost interest and the other two advanced.  

That could be part of the problem, if the other two are belittling her for not being as good as they are. Just a thought.

Snowballs wrote

Petronio wrote

  Two things: first, she was on the cusp of advancing to being comfortable on black diamonds; she lost interest and the other two advanced.  

That could be part of the problem, if the other two are belittling her for not being as good as they are. Just a thought.

No, the girls get along great together.  I am going to try to get her to bring one of her friends who she was in ski club with.

Petronio

I'm a little late to this party..
My youngest declared she will  never ski or board again last year. She is 18, my 21 yr old still loves it..

it is what it is...

Hey Sno,  read "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie.
Some say its corny,but many people credit the book for their success in life.
If you find friends and success not to your cup of tea I sugesst Irving Tressler's
"How to lose friends and alienate people"

I gotta say. I think this thread shows what a great bunch of people are on here. There's more than one point of view and a few disagreements maybe but there were a lot of thoughtful sincere suggestions. I find it gratifying to see.

2000yearoldskier wrote

Hey Sno,  read "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie.
Some say its corny,but many people credit the book for their success in life.

+1000

Sno you need to read that book.  Great suggestion 2000

Back in the day when I was a teenager, screw status and a pager, it really sucked that I had no one to go skiing with outside of ski club.  I had a season pass, but none of my grrrl crew would be willing to go on weekends, skip class, etc.  My dad, in all his glory did his level best to be a great dad, but in teenage girl mind, I was perpetually mortified by everything he wore, did, and said.  It was an uninformed opinion.  A least I had my younger sister for the weekends, or some dirtbag dudefriends that would willingly ditch school.  I did end up teaching a couple of non-skier friends though, and it totally paid off. I even sold one of them my old equipment for super cheap, just so she wouldn't have to rent. Both of these friends still ski now, years later! :)

I dealt with the cold by switching to snowboarding, it made a world of difference.          

So advice: subsidize one of her friends, get them on a snowboard, and introduce them to dirtbags.

CapnJazzHands wrote

   

So advice: subsidize one of her friends, get them on a snowboard, and introduce them to dirtbags.

Yes, No, and F No

Send child to hypnotist for reprogramming

Jon951 wrote

Send child to hypnotist for reprogramming

If this doesn't work, disown them!  ;).

Coach Z wrote

CapnJazzHands wrote

   

So advice: subsidize one of her friends, get them on a snowboard, and introduce them to dirtbags.

Yes, No, and F No

 I see so many ski families forcing their kids on to skis. Give them a choice! I have witnessed some high pressure asshole parents on the mountain, it is no wonder their kids don't want to ride.

 Get her a good instructor who can show her how to ski challenging terrain.  Next,  would take her on a trip out west where it is good.  You and her.  Teach her what real skiing feels like not on piste hard pack that is most days out here.  For me this is why I ski. If I had to ski blue hard packed only I would not be passionate about the sport.  If she skies on some fresh powder and does not like skiing then she won!